Letters From Abroad
by AiLing
Summary: Letters that Owen and Amelia wrote to each other when Owen was away in the battlefield


**These were letters than Owen and Amelia wrote to each other when Owen was away at war.**

 **Dear Owen**

When you left for the army again, you took at piece of me with you. It's my fault, I should've stopped you from going when I still had the chance. I should've told you that I did not want you going back there and putting your life in danger again when you were still in front of me in body and flesh.

Instead, I did what I knew how to do best- to avoid. To run from it all. That last night we were together, I should've opened my mouth to tell you how I actually feel about you. I should've bared my heart and soul to you that night and tell you that I am falling in love with you and I just can't bear to see you go. I snould've hugged you tight and never let you go.

But alas, my body had plans of its own. Just like every time we are together in the same room, my heart started beating so fast I felt like I was having palpitations. When you cupped my face with your hands and stroke my hair - your favourite gesture of mine which always comforts me, I am just lost in your arms. I was unable to form coherent thoughts I just melted into your kiss there and then. One thing lead to another and soon we were tangled passionately underneath the bedsheets. No words were needed, just feeling each other's presence and warm embrace.

The next morning, I opened my eyes to find that you were already gone, the indentation of the pillow beside me indicating that you left not too long ago. I vowed to myself to set aside some time that day to pull you aside to tell you how I actually feel - and maybe if I was lucky enough, to convince you to pull out from the army.

But that day had other plans for me, as I was pulled from surgery to surgery and several consults in the ER with no time to spare to even grab something to eat. I knew your flight was at 4pm, and I was desperately seeking for a chance to hold you, to see you once last time before you headed off to the battlefield. My chance came when you suddenly appeared at the observation gallery of my OR, watching intently as I removed the malignant tumour from the 10 year old child. Our eyes locked, and we had an unspoken conversation right then. I wish I could rush up to you and hug you tight and never let you go then, but my hands were buried deep in the brain of the child. By the time I was done and hurriedly scrubbed out- you were long gone.

After calling you numerous times and getting no answer, I knew that you had long gone to the airport and that you were probably well on your way to the Middle East now.

But I still sped the several miles to the airport anyways, hoping against hope for the slightest chance that your flight was delayed and that I might get to hold you for one last time before you left. But a look at the departure signboard showed that you had long flown away. I found a nearby seat and tears of anger and frustration started rolling down my cheeks, I was furious at myself for all the missed chances we had, for all the chances I missed to tell you exactly how I feel about you.

The next few weeks I just couldn't function at all. I am like a walking zombie, going about my daily chores without thinking of what I am doing. I would wake up in the morning and reach out to the other side of the bed, almost forgetting that you weren't here. I would wonder what you're doing right now in Iraq, whether you'restill safe and sound, or whether you were wounded by an ambush from the enemies. I would think of youeven as I check on my patients, even as I'm scrubbed in for amazing brain surgeries. And nighttimes are the worst, I would lie awake in my bed in the big lonely house trying to block out from my mind the worst case scenario, that I might never see you again. The house is just too big and lonely with no one else staying here. Meredith had taken off with Zola and Bailey, and the house is just so empty and quiet now. But still in the middle of the night I thought I could hear echos of the Sheperd family laughing, the happy giggles of Zola and Bailey and Derek's voice talking lovingly to Meredith or reading a bedtime story for the children.

In the end, I just couldn't bear it anymore, the house is too haunted to live in. I spent most of my nights in oncall rooms on uncomfortable beds, and sometimes I admit I used the spare key of your trailer to sneak into your trailer to spend the night. I would hold one of the plaid shirts you left behind to sleep and smell your scent.

I just can't stand it anymore. At day time, I busy myself with consults and surgeries with little time for rest, as I wanted to block out the painful thoughts from my mind. I don't even eat in the cafeteria anymore, as it brings back memories of lunch time with you, Derek and Meredith. Even dinner is a solemn affair, with takeaway pizza or Chinese food for one most of the time. But the nights are the loneliest. Nobody visits, even family and my friends in LA have ceased to call after I shut them down numerous times. Sometimes I find myself sitting on the deck of the trailer, staring out at the vast sky, studying the consellation of stars and then zooming in on one particular star, and wondering whether you are looking at the same star too.

I am now starting to crave for oxy again. Only oxy can block away the pain and loneliness I feel. Please God, if You are really up there listening, do not let me succumb to this temptation again.

 **Love Amelia**

 **Dear Amelia**

As I am writing this- I can hear the sounds of gunshots going off at a distance, and people shrieking in horror. I can hear footsteps of people running for their lives. It is a common occurence daily, we are immune to it now. The sounds seem to be coming nearer and nearer, but I am still rooted here in my spot in my bunker. I just can't move. I have no life left inside of me. I think I left all my heart and soul back in Seattle with you.

I should've told you earlier how I feel about you. We are certainly NOT a plane crash, we are not an accident. We are beautiful, we are meant to be together. I am very sure of that.

But everytime I lay my eyes on you, I am just so enchanted by your beauty and your passion, that I am at loss for words. I would just drown in your cerulean blue eyes and your soft brown curls. You just take my breath and my thoughts away every single time, like a breeze.

Now, you are half a world away, and I am wondering what you are doing now. Are you busy with your hand in someone's brain? Or are you laying wide awake as I am thinking of me too? Because every night, when there is no warning of an ambush , I would sneak out of the bunker, and stare at the clear blue sky, looking for a particular star, wondering if you were looking at the same star too.

Now I have no idea whether I'll still be alive tomorrow. The enemies might very well find our bunker tonight and shot us all. Then I'll never get the chance to tell you how much I love you. So no matter what happens, I really hope you receive this letter so that you know that I love you so much and you mean so much to me.

I promise I'll make it up to you- if I manage to come out of here alive.

 **Love Owen**

 **Comments, reviews are very welcome….:)**


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